Daytime single motherism

2008-04-04T17:20:08Z

+2 raves

Who ever said being a single mom was easy is absolutly nuts.. lol I'm not exactly a single mother like those woman, i do have help after 5 pm lol but being who i am a well known unmedicated BI-POLAR with sever ADHD and O.D.D and being preggo again on top of it all, its not exactly easy, but its not hard either, i think the days i spend with my lil one make me a stronger person and defently has taught me some patience, not alot but some lol I dont think it would be as hard as i think it is if Jadein would start talking.. i dont mean the typical 19 month old talks, but like how her cousin who is 2 and he can hold a convo's yanno. she will learn in her own time i know i know, but ehh its boring during the daytime i have no one to talk to and when he dad comes home i start to spout at the mouth about anything and anything and he just sorta shrugs me off it hurts, he has told me once he honestly didnt care, that crushed me, but i understood he was tired sore from work, but it was like woah someone i can talk to that understand wooohooo and then wham! slammed down.... lol I dont go on the internet like the now a day moms do, (not saying they all do but ive noticed a huge amount do..) im only on when j-bug goes to sleep, so out of a 12 hr day of her dad being gone, im online like 4 hrs, (2 naps at roughly 2 hrs a time) the rest of the time im teaching her to associate with what things are colors numbers feelings. ohh and i know something else that bugs the fucking shit outta me, shes a freaking smart ass, she refuses to call me mommy, im "hey" and when i say "mommy" she says "yeah you.. " the only time she calls me mommy is when her father puts her in timeout and she will sit there and scream "daddy.. wahhhhhhhhhhhhhh wahhh dada daad aa ., then all the sudden we will hear. mama, mommmyyyyyy moommyyy" yeah i see how it is lol only call me by my name when your in trouble.. grrr.. lol I cant say she doesnt love me when she gets hurt and her dad is here, she comes running to me, not him not anyone else, just me and if im not there to comfort her she crys and crys till i come and get her even tho people are there that can help and comfort her. lol thanks for reading my rant on my boring days, if ur a fellow mom. leave your posts on being a "daytime single motherism's" same as if your a dad, or just leave anything lol

latest dream

2008-02-28T05:52:35Z

Jessa ~COB

+1 raves

Standing outside the graveyard wall I dared not to go in and walk around, but I did anyway. Taking a step forward, I pushed the gates open. As the gates flew open they made a loud screeching noise that made my heartbeat faster and sent shivers up my spine. As I entered the graveyard, the air smelled musty. Fog was sliding across the moss covered ground and over the cracked tombstones. I felt a cold breeze of wind swipe across my bare neck. I tried pushing the fog to the side, but is swirled around my hand. Sliding my hand threw the fog, I smacked my hand across a tombstone. The tombstone was as cold as the wind blowing against my neck. As i continue walking deeper into the graveyard, I felt as if someone was behind me, I turned around slowly feeling someones cold hand press against my skin but there was no one there as i look towards the gate that I had walked through, it was shut and locked behind me. Pondering in my head I wondered how the gate had been shut behind me and locked without me hearing it. I turned back around and walked forward noticing a face in the woods ahead. Finally approaching the woods which seemed like miles away. While looking for the face that I had seen before was no longer were it was before, but as i took another step forward I fell upon a marsh lagoon. As i was getting up from the marsh lagoon, I felt hands all over my body as if they were trying to rip me part but they weren't. The hands that i had been feeling where leading me towards a tombstone that was out in the middle of the marsh lagoon. Arriving upon the tombstone it said nothing it was completely blank. Next thing I know I was in the marsh lagoon staring at a dead body that has been there for only hours. Reaching out for the body it grabbed me and pulled me towards it. The body was pale, bruised and beaten. Looking at the body more closely I noticed it was an lover that I had years ago, as i continued to look at the naked body it pulled me up out of the water and started talking to me saying this is all because of you, I'm dead in this marsh lagoon with a broken heart that you had broken when you found your true love I came here to wait for you and talk to you how i felt about you but you never came until now. The naked dead girl continued to talk as if I was the one who had beaten her and raped her when it wasn't. Looking upon the dead body I was in the air being held up by my throat, her nails dug into my neck and threw me against the tombstone knocking me out for hours, when i finally woke up I was in my bed as if it never happened. I as was getting up for where i was laying. my husband woke up and wrapped his arms around me saying good morning hunny, giving him a deep kiss I told him i was going to go take a shower, he looked at me and said ok and said make sure I that clean my neck. Walking into the bathroom I looked at my neck and saw 5 deep scratches on my neck if as my throat had been cut, looking confused I asked my lover how i had gotten them but he didn't know all he knew was that they found in a graveyard half dead. I started the shower and the face of my ex lover had appeared in the steam i jumped back quick wondering what the fuck is going on. The ex lover of mine was telling me to take care of my loved ones and if I didn't he would come back to finish his job that wasn;t finished.

SodaHead - Jessa ~COB's Blog

Daytime single motherism

latest dream