Her face speaks of hardship
the years she sacrificed to all of us
the trips to the doctors and dentist
the trips she had to forgo to the beauty parlor
so we could have the latest toys
the willingness she had to keep our hopes up
when all was falling down around us
she knew how to make it seem alright
Her spirit speaks of endless joy
as she sings her little old school tunes
as the proper situation allows
She is always hoping we make the best of ourselves
for she gave us the wings of dreams to soar

I am a big time Momma's girl.. and she is coming tomorrow to visit me.. and I am like ecstatic

HELP ME I AM WEAK...

Swimming in a cheesy goo..

I can't help it against a high fatty temptation..

I am weak when it comes to the purgatory of circular demons

Won't you like to join me

Swimming in my personal pizza hell!!

Aimlessly I wonder like a lonesome child

smelling of the liquid death I eat!!

Won't you come and find me!!

Swimming in my comfortable pizza hell!!

What a sweet lazy feelin when I've got nuttin to do..

What a wonderful languid moment when I can say it's time

What time is it? You ask

A time to waste some time..

But when it comes to this time.. one always tends to do

the something you oughtnt not to do..

maybe it's time to get somethin accomplished..

forget it I say.. that's not my way..

maybe it's time to create somethin..

forget it I say.. immortality is not fer today..

What a careless sing songy thing to do

Doin nuthin.. worry bout nuthin..

I've got nuttin I gotta do..

acccomplishin nuttin.. carin nuttin..

Have You Ever Seen It?
Current mood: artistic
Category: Goals, Plans, Hopes

Have You Ever watched them closely..

Those who are brimming with brilliance

but a little short on self appreciation

have you ever sat silently and stared

at those who accomplished more than most

but ended it either with a handful of pills

or a loaded gun to the brain

did you ever catch a glimpse

of the humanity behind their shields of pretense

have you ever noticed it

or are you fooling yourself as did they?

I respect the rights for you to express all of your opinions so I hope you'll respect mine.. I have been pro palestinian for years.. and because of this I happened to come upon this one true story about a young girl who went to visit the Palestinian people for the peace corps.. she didn't meet a bunch of terrorists like the Bush peeps would like you to think.. she met a group of folks..who showed her the utmost acceptance and hospitality.. although they had very little left.. she decided to stand up for these people and I wrote a lil poem depicting what happened to her because of her choice.. keep in mind this is all true...



I've seen the few emails

saved by censored hands

of how you dared

though young and scared

to travel to far off lands

not knowing how the waring

world stands

You've befriended an infamous

population

according to the evening news

You've founded the truth

without manipulation

of a suffering community

with less to gain

with a whole lot more to loose

You've seen the noose

around necks of men, women and children

whose only crime is to presevere

You've stuck it out with those

people who accepted you

through poverty

through bloodshed

through trial and fear

you had a lot of promise

closer to your family and home

What drove you to wander

to the direct path of danger

to an end of pain

helpless and alone

You must have a will of steele

to have a faith in hospitable

strangers

while dwelling in the closing

walls of their ghetto

You've stuck up for all of those

like they were your brothers and

sisters

Tell me, dear child

what flashes of your short life

flashed before you

as the wheels, three stories tall,

crushed the soil before your eyes

Tell me, sweet girl

what unwavering will do you possess

to surrender your promises of the

future

to surrender between metal, rubber

...earth and grass

were you being wise

as eternal sleep overtook your eyes

I hope paradise remembers you

better than the self

inflicted blindness of the

prime time news

A strong front for a delicate spirit
Current mood: contemplative
Category: Dreams and the Supernatural

I was one of the many

impressed by the pretense of strength although you were scared

You lived a life for the moment

and on the way you picked up a recipe for disaster

No big deal it could have happened to any of us

You lived and learned

suffered and finally triumphed

and now you hope to make the most of your limited time with us

to save others from your unfortunate fate

good for you, I would have just wasted away..

I sat with my chosen partner reveling in your courage

and the humorous way you recanted all of your pain

You knew how to reach us

for you knew how it was to be young

you haven't forgotten your carefree days

it was my husband who wanted to shake your hand afterwards

I was too intimidated by your worldly past

when I saw your eyes from a few feet away

I sensed the pain and fragility of your time on this planet

you, the image of all that it is beautiful and glamorous

of what is Hollywood and New York and San Francisco

and the grand mansion of the Playboy Bunny Palace..

and it was I of the Kansas farms and the Wyoming terrain that could see..

your light eyes of pain and regret.. were frail.. and fading

but your spirit tells us.."We'll just have to see..!!"



I guess this lil poem needs explanation.. my hubby and I went to see this one gal speak ..her name was Rebekka Armstrong and she was a Playboy Playmate of 1986.. and apparently she got the HIV virus and AIDS quite a few years ago.. I was under the impression that she would be whiny and bitter but this gal gave an excellent talk and blamed no one for her fate but herself.. she was a brave lil spirit who knew how to reach the college crowd with her story of becoming violently ill with the medications thrown at her in a time when the world didn't understand much about AIDS and her drug use and binge drinking party days trying to escape from her pain.. well we went to thank her for her talk and I just felt really sad for her.. because her eyes were so lite and seemed so delicate .. and I thought of how she was doomed because of her illness,, I know it wasn't the right thing to be thinking.. but that's what I thought..

It has been a lil while

Since I have seen you at least on a regular basis

Seems like you have only called on me when you really needed me

But it's ok..stay for a spell

Youre face still makes me smile

What have you been up too lately

I really would like to know

Is he treating you well

Are you still into that art thing

Looks like you did something to your hair

I like it.. I hear its in style

Are you going to came around more often

Tell me.. I would like it if you did?

I would like to get reacquainted once more

Life is too short to be strangers

I like seeing you from time to time

I guess this one came from a lot of personal soul searching i have been doing in some very important areas in my life.. I don't care to spell it out.. those of you going through the same thing will understand..

shivering in the morbid night

the thermostat points at seventy three

but not within

weird is me

nervous spats of thought question my insanity

while my limbs move on

what happened to this vessel of calm

weird is me

i am afraid to take chances

make choices

make anything

what is this peculiar torture I put myself thorough

weird is me

ignored by the outside world

she's a nice girl they say

could they understand the time bomb inside

weird is they?

no weird is me..

concerns concerns..
Current mood: creative
Category: Writing and Poetry

concerns concerns

where is the peace of mind

I thought Ive earned

where is the fruitful tree

of which you promised me

where is the turning table

throughout the passage of time

actions reactions

of which I tried to learn

but always getting burned

my youth hath died

and curiosity waned

through the ecstasy and pain

and lessons of mistakes

I still want and ache

to go back and relive

through the mistakes I have committed

have I sold out to the negativity

that spent the years wearing me down?

yet another poem, Cynicism Disease
Current mood: contemplative
Category: Writing and Poetry

the air carries with it now

a peculiar germ passed by the airwaves

a odd feeling of increasing hopelessness

the cynism of the world

the feeling of the end

the water fills us full of it

when they say the water is no longer safe

when they say the sun will fry us alive

when the claim the air in our lungs will kill

when they say our neighbors only want to murder our way of life

and forget how we are obliterating theirs

the medical fat cats laugh at the way we suffer

holding back the cure as we cry out

the political demons switch their beady eyes the other way

towards the votes and the promises of compensation

and forget to offer us the hand outs

that will potentially save our lives

has god forgotten us

or is it the greedy that has forgotten him..

The Angry Me Poem
Current mood: angsty
Category: Life

The syndicated fodder
and the late night casts
casts down the shadow
of another celebrity passed
when the darkness falls over my eyes
what will they do?
They talk of the weather
or of how this pet saved the rich plump child
of a senator's son
will I be another one
forgotten about
my rented space up for sale
who would be here to tell
of the great feats
or the personal struggles it was to be the angry me
no chances are
you will talk of the soulless pretenders
who live off the sweat of your backs
you will say of how those cheaters in Washington
who wrangled you dry and weak
but told you how you needed them to be
the ones holding onto the lever
the controls of fate of the homes
you dwell in
you will remember those who don't give a flying rat's care
about how you felt when you Mom died
of how you tried over and over again
to accomplish your important tasks
to try and sell your home
or revive your dog
you are expected to drop all and wail
when the rich fall in all their glory
yet when it comes to your demise
they wouldn't return the favor
none of them
accept this fact
it's a thoughtless act
to put idiots on the pedestals
tell your mom you love her
tell your siblings they are the ones
you worship and look up to
for they hold your well being
as the known hold their egos
Please..

I love this time of year.. have a great time with your families.. and loved ones!!

I am tempted ...soo tempted .. right now.. as you may or may not know.. there has been a metaphorical thorn in my side.. when it comes to my marraige.. I am eating lunch alone.. due to my hubby having a couple of days off for the holiday.. I eat in his office.. and I have found out that I am able to access his email account on his puter... there has been this annoying lil southern gal .. that has been having a lil flirt fest.. and I would absolutely loooove to get her email.. and just do enough to shoo her off... b/c she is realllllly annoying me.. I had a chance to look into his email once.. and I was unable to get it.. should I or shouldn't I..

Bideawee has done it again.. they know how to get to me.. this poor sweet lil angel, Halo was thrown off a multistory when it was just over 1.. poor lil baby is traumatized and healing.. look at this site to see how you can help..
http://www.bideawee.org/programs_&_services/halo_ars.php

I really enjoyed playing around with YouTube the last couple of days and I was able to watch these movies I have always been meaning to watch for years.. and you probably guessed that I put them into polls.. in order to earn a few raves here are the links..
http://www.sodahead.com/question/104026/
http://www.sodahead.com/question/104054/
http://www.sodahead.com/question/104360/
http://www.sodahead.com/question/104368/
http://www.sodahead.com/question/104375/

Well enjoy them and if you have any black and white classic movies.. (preferable of the Horror movie genre) that you would like for me to put in a poll.. let me know below.. have a wonderful weekend!!

Here are my creations for this contest
here's the contest
http://www.sodahead.com/blog/7179/
and here are my creations..

Not in this blog but in this poll .. come one come all.. it may not be Halloween yet.. but a good creepy story is always fun..
NOTE: do not enter the contest here on the blog go to this poll
http://www.sodahead.com/question/102402/

Ok I admit it.. I am a shamless self promoter >:))) Yet, here are a few polls that I made that would make your Friday the 13th very speeeeehshulll!!
http://www.sodahead.com/question/100732/

http://www.sodahead.com/question/100517/

http://www.sodahead.com/question/91011/

http://www.sodahead.com/question/101075/

http://www.sodahead.com/question/101169/
Well.. I will see you all on Monday!!
Happy Friday the 13th
Happy Flag Day
Happy Father's Day
>:))))

I think that it would be a good time for everyone on here butting heads be it politically... age wise.. religion wise.. to consider just letting our differences be our differences.. and call off these meaningless SH wars that have been going. I have been a participant in some of these wars as well... and in the end.. all you have are hurt feelings.. and useless rivalries.. If anyone wants to openly express their acceptance of this truce.. and express it in your SH name.. just add gpac.. to show you share my view.. or just leave a comment.. I for one.. will try my best to not promote anymore wars on SH.. it should be a relaxing experience to be part of this community.. not a cyber minefield.

When there once was a full spectrum
of color of loves.. happiness.. guilt and loss
now it's wiped clear.. the color of life has left me
the soul is now empty ..all that was kept close
now has abandoned me
She is slowly draining my possession of your love
she is becoming your kindred soul from the heaven above
I have a shredded recollection of when I was the sole spirit you held high
now she slithered in and taken away your kind eye
I haven't even the strength left to tear my hair and cry
I am left just to lay alone with maddening reasonings as to why
did I deserve to loose you in the midst of confusion
I just don't know.. I am all lot of fight
keep your thoughts of her
to keep you cozy in the deep darkness of the night
try to fulfill.. your delusion of self worth
just remember you have dropped one
who was your missing piece
until she returns to the cold earth

Another lil orphaned pup needs your help. He was shot in the leg with a pellet gun...and this injury was left untreated.. Due to the pain and the severity of the injury .. his leg had to be amputated.. He will need to go through a difficult rehabilitation period.. and needs help.
Here's his story
http://www.bideawee.org/programs_&_services/scooter_ars.php

I hate to take sides.. but this time.. I think it's necessary.. to those of you who were clever enough to use these little initials.. that just goes to show you have the brain power that is lacking in those who act with extreme bigotry towards you .. and proceed to block you.. and act all innocent.. I would add this to my name... although I was fortunate enough to block them before they had the opportunity to do so to me.. Great work.. and let those jerk offs fume and froth at the mouth..

I am at a loss. My hubby .. who all of you that know me.. is the ultimate love of my life.. is slowly slipping away I feel.. We have been together for 8 years.. married for 6. .. and he has been texting this Chelsey chick from North Carolina for awhile now.. she is calling him her Prince.. and she is compromising our time together texting him back... of course.. my hubby is at fault as well.. try as I may.. bringing up every valid point in the book.. crying.... etc.. I am even trying to find her myself over the net so I can let her know that she is in unwelcome territory and had better back off.. I waited a looong time for my love.. and she thinks she can come in and tear him away.. well.. she's got another thing coming.. My husband has some crazy notion that I will move with him to N Carolina.. I said.. move if you like.. but you will be moving there without me.. I am at an almost close to panic level and I bother him about it all the time.. and he says I am driving him away.. Sooo.. what am I supposed to do.. sit there quietly and let this little whatever she is ruin what we have been spending 8 years building.. which is our lives together.. She has a son who is 9 when she is 30 years old.. I haven't any children yet.. and we were going to start trying soon.. well.. with her in the picture.. I am reluctant to even think about it anymore.. no since in bringing any poor kid into this marriage.. which might be nonexistent.. if I can't get to this chick.. I am on the lookout...that's for sure.. I am not about to lie down and let this fluesey move in on what's rightfully mine..

Here is my poll that started it all
http://www.sodahead.com/question/95960/
Instead of being all hateful and ganging up on each other to downrave people let's just spread the love and rave for rave's sake.. make your own polls.. and it seems to work.. if you want to get your first thousand raves of make it to 10 K .. like I am about to do .. this seems to do the job.. have fun and keep the love going.. :)

I am concerned about some of the pics Soddahead has available for everyone to use... here is one of example which by no means is the most disgusting.. is ther something we can do to clean this up?http://i122.photobucket.com/albums/o278/queenofdiamonds82/...

The last month and a half has been quite a challenging one for myself and my husband with a gentle spirit. I think we are about to change out location as well as our direction of life and although it's a bit uncertain.. maybe it's wise.. it's hard to say...yet, this isn't the first.. and by God this won't be the last.
For about a year now we have tried to live life in the so called correct manner. My husband worked with his father.. I encouraged him to do so.. thinking.. finally an option to make give our lives direction and purpose.. yet now.. I see this wasn't meant to be.. the father in law.. has things kind of messed up in his mind.. although he means well.. he is unable to give his only son a second chance completely..
I also.. being the little white girl from Kansas.. often have a white washed view of the world around me.. The town we not live in.. a town where my hubby lived for most of his life.. isn't so pure and inviting.. last night I yelled ferociously in it's true face.. contorted with prejudice and hate.. sooo willing to harm it's own citizen in a sort of brutish.. and unjust pack mentality.. as my hubby and I were trying to escape from a group of eight guys .. trying to do away with what they considered foreign and unwelcome..
The initial reaction is to just fly away... and maybe we should.. we might fly away to the bigger city where we can MAYBE distance ourselves from hate.. failed expectation.. and such.. but.. is this the way to solve it all.. to leave it all to fester for later?

The nine lives we have endured together
as the six years have past of our marital bonds
the ties and hoops that binds us have unraveled
yet more and more our love has grown
and our hearts have grown increasingly fond

The hundreds of years of troubles we have dived into since
the wedding day we have sewn our futures into one
we have solved the moments that have grown more tense
and celebrated the triumphs that each has won

May twenty second has marked the day
when each has gained a little but given away
a part of ourselves to each other a pair was born
a love unfettered a twin spirit untorn

I wish my one and only a Happy 6th Anniversary

Eight years of troubles
and only a few months of bliss
just look 'how far we come"
Yet.. we've only come to this
stuck on a little island
I feel you wish to escape
See the miles we've wandered
Yet you wonder aimlessly into the abyss
I try to offer words of comfort
and provide the arms you need to rest
but you look around
and abandon our cozy nest
The dreams are left hanging
the promises left corn husk dry
you are leaving me in spirit
leaving me to wonder exactly why..

I found this story about a grey tabby, silk , who was found burned on most of her body... she is beng taken care of.. but it costs a lot of money and she needs a lot of care to heal..She is in danger of infection shock and other complications due to the severity of her burns.. please.. donate what you can.
http://www.bideawee.org/programs_&_services/silk_ars.php

All of the moms in the world are very precious and sweet
We should sing praises in your name
and wash your calloused feet
The Mama and mommy and mothers and moms
Each carry the gift of love
we wish for in poetry and melodic songs
In seems a teachery that one day is reserved for you
when each blessed hour should be cherished
when we are love by your sweet spirit so true
Kick back and watch Oprah with a drink
and Happy Mother's day to all
and I hope the others fail to stink