Group
Question
•
Child Protectors
"The mind is a mysterious thing."
But we still know enough about it to have psychology. The one thing we do know is that thought pattern most often dictates what we do and opinions are often molded by the people around us, even if in spite. Many times what is acceptable can lead to dangerous paths, such as pornography can lead to the idea of seeing those you want as mere objects or how the concept of beauty can alter how we feel about ourselves.
In any case, this is the point of it all.
There is someone I know who looks very young and therefore guys either don't want to get involved with her because of the age they think she is or they want to because she looks so young. The "too young" verses the "young enough". Society is so focused on looking young and getting surgery to keep it. We know about how it gets children to think so early about sex, but it also is doing the very same thing (to a degree) that it officially hates: pedophilia. Now, I doubt that this can be fixed considering how thoroughly it is embedded into society, but would like to know how you would fix this or how you feel or anything else you have to say about it.
But we still know enough about it to have psychology. The one thing we do know is that thought pattern most often dictates what we do and opinions are often molded by the people around us, even if in spite. Many times what is acceptable can lead to dangerous paths, such as pornography can lead to the idea of seeing those you want as mere objects or how the concept of beauty can alter how we feel about ourselves.
In any case, this is the point of it all.
There is someone I know who looks very young and therefore guys either don't want to get involved with her because of the age they think she is or they want to because she looks so young. The "too young" verses the "young enough". Society is so focused on looking young and getting surgery to keep it. We know about how it gets children to think so early about sex, but it also is doing the very same thing (to a degree) that it officially hates: pedophilia. Now, I doubt that this can be fixed considering how thoroughly it is embedded into society, but would like to know how you would fix this or how you feel or anything else you have to say about it.
Loading...-
Answered We can do something about this.
We can start by concentrating on teaching our children self-discipline as early as the toddler years--when they first recognize that there are behaviors that require a "yes" or a "no." By following through and seeing that they maintain the restrictions we've set and also by practicing what we preach (so to speak), we can aid them on their journey to self-control.
Secondly, we can protect them until they can successfully protect themselves by knowing where they are, whom they are with (certainly not allowing them to be with those who might take advantage of them), and what they are doing as much as possible. Parents who turn their children loose and allow them freedom to do whatever they wish are giving the "green light" to predators, sexual and otherwise, to hurt them physically and emotionally. They need adult supervision and protection until they are equipped to safeguard themselves and make common-sense decisions.
Raising children to be survivors is not easy. It takes much patience and care. We must teach them how not to be gullible, by teaching them that to love other people is not to believe everything they tell us, (even those we think are our friends). or to do everything others want us to do without questioning to some extent others' motives.
According to statistics, many more girls than boys become victims. This is due partly because we and society set different standards for boys than we do for girls. In subtle ways we let our boys from infancy believe...We can start by concentrating on teaching our children self-discipline as early as the toddler years--when they first recognize that there are behaviors that require a "yes" or a "no." By following through and seeing that they maintain the restrictions we've set and also by practicing what we preach (so to speak), we can aid them on their journey to self-control.
Secondly, we can protect them until they can successfully protect themselves by knowing where they are, whom they are with (certainly not allowing them to be with those who might take advantage of them), and what they are doing as much as possible. Parents who turn their children loose and allow them freedom to do whatever they wish are giving the "green light" to predators, sexual and otherwise, to hurt them physically and emotionally. They need adult supervision and protection until they are equipped to safeguard themselves and make common-sense decisions.
Raising children to be survivors is not easy. It takes much patience and care. We must teach them how not to be gullible, by teaching them that to love other people is not to believe everything they tell us, (even those we think are our friends). or to do everything others want us to do without questioning to some extent others' motives.
According to statistics, many more girls than boys become victims. This is due partly because we and society set different standards for boys than we do for girls. In subtle ways we let our boys from infancy believe they are more special than girls and should be allowed to do certain things which girls cannot or should not do, like having more freedom and being more aggressive than girls. Taken to extremes, this instills within our sons a lack of respect for females in general. The Eastern countries, like Iran, where females are subjugated and abused are examples of this.
Could we parents and other adults, without realizing it, be responsible for many of the victimizations and injustices that occur to and among our children? Most likely!(less) -
Answered We can do something about this.
this is getting on my nerves: the people that are thinking about it too early. they obviously dont realize the dangers of STDs and such.... this leads into pornography men think that the kids that are too young to realize whats going on. and the people that are young enough can stop it ( or try ) so when people kidnap kids that look young for their age they are in for a surprise. all we can possibly do is march and protest, sadly -
Answered We can do something about this.
I don't know what I can do to help others, but..........In my home, my children are taught God above all things. They are taught that they have been blessed from head to toe and they are perfect the way they are. I try to filter TV time and exposure to junk magazines and online experiences. I also try not to wear makeup or get all done up unless it's for a date with my hubbly or a large social event. I try to be a role model and example and most importantly I am HONEST when they DO ask questions. I tell them that there are strangers and people who like to hurt children and I drill them monthly on emergency info as well as mom and dad's info. I have had people tell me that I am neurotic, sick, paranoid, crazy and naieve. When my babies avoid crisis or a dangerous situation, those people will call me a good and prepared mom. I have no idea if my answer had anything to do with the question, but there it is!!!!
Be blessed!
Dee -
Answered We can do something about this.
By teaching children at an early age to respect themselves and not to let people use them as something they shouldn't. They should be taught the basics of there existance, to honor GOD. I realize some might get offended, but my view is that if the children understand the basic reason of being, then they should understand that they are beautiful in there own way. The beauty that is within will shine through to the world when you are happy with yourself. They also need to understand that what they see in the media is nothing more than a store front window and it's not worth the pain and aggrivation to be something your not. -
Answered We can do something about this.
We need to be teaching our children what is right and wrong, rather than leaving it up to the school systems and the media. Parents need to play an active roll in their children's lives. Communication is important. We need to be discussing with our kids what healthy choices are and what the result will be if they make unwise decisions. -
Answered We can do something about this.
We have relinquished morals and values development to Hollywood. The determination of attractiveness and "what men or women want" is predetermined by the created images, whether on the big screen or on television where female news anchors are often cast aside for the younger, more lithe personality. It is no different than any other "brain washing" system that seeks to create an image, endow that image with behaviors deemed acceptable and unacceptable based on the character being portrayed.
Two avenues to influence this challenge: Ensure strong family values that diminish "Hollywood style" images; focus families on health vice image; minimize exposure--support better films and television programming by watching those where image is buried by plot. -
Answered We can do something about this.
We can raise our children to see that what we look like is not what matters most. If everyone would stop buying into the shorts with names all over the bottom and shirts that reveal everything, our children would not aspire to do these things. I feel no shame when I tell my daughter that a certain piece of clothing is trash. She is learning early that the clothes do not make the person. I know this is a little different than what your question was, but they are all related, it starts with the clothes, then does this make me look fat, do I have too many wrinkles???? I see nothing wrong with wanting to look your best, but at what and who's cost? -
Amen.
Psychology is a scam!! I don't know if you are interested in checking this out, but it's a wonderful site and it promotes Biblical Counsel. I am taking the course right now.
Sorry I take every opportunity I get to promote God's word. =)
http://www.nouthetic.org/inde...
Be blessed.
Dee -
Answered We can do something about this.
If we are raising our kids to be self-respecting moral people, we simply model it. As a husband and father, I honor and love my wife and they see that as normal male behavior. I show affection to her (appropriate for others to see) and provide positive alternatives to the kids who are constantly given invitations to go here and there unsupervised. I don't just say "No" but we give good and cool alternatives so that they know that they aren't being hemmed in by overly-strict parents. Actually, we ARE!!
Maybe that's why the Mouse has my money. We never let our kids go out of town with other families, even though we are certain that they are wonderful, moral people. We provide positive alternatives. THEIR kids go with US on vacation - not the other way around. We don't have our teenage daughter out dating guys. NO WAY. We provide better fun alternatives. Sometimes it costs us money, but she is too young and impressionable to throw her to the wolves. Young girls are simply not emotionally mature enough to properly deal with sexual pressures.
"But Dad, don't you trust me?". "Of course I do, sweetheart. I trust you with all of my heart. You are in your teens with very little experience in this dangerous world. It isn't your character that am concerned about - it is your youthful judgment. It is just a part of growing up and that is why you have parents who love and respect you. No one loves you like your Mom and me and we have been entrusted to love and protect you, just ...If we are raising our kids to be self-respecting moral people, we simply model it. As a husband and father, I honor and love my wife and they see that as normal male behavior. I show affection to her (appropriate for others to see) and provide positive alternatives to the kids who are constantly given invitations to go here and there unsupervised. I don't just say "No" but we give good and cool alternatives so that they know that they aren't being hemmed in by overly-strict parents. Actually, we ARE!!
Maybe that's why the Mouse has my money. We never let our kids go out of town with other families, even though we are certain that they are wonderful, moral people. We provide positive alternatives. THEIR kids go with US on vacation - not the other way around. We don't have our teenage daughter out dating guys. NO WAY. We provide better fun alternatives. Sometimes it costs us money, but she is too young and impressionable to throw her to the wolves. Young girls are simply not emotionally mature enough to properly deal with sexual pressures.
"But Dad, don't you trust me?". "Of course I do, sweetheart. I trust you with all of my heart. You are in your teens with very little experience in this dangerous world. It isn't your character that am concerned about - it is your youthful judgment. It is just a part of growing up and that is why you have parents who love and respect you. No one loves you like your Mom and me and we have been entrusted to love and protect you, just as we love and protect our marriage....".
That's why Disney vacations (our treat) and Florida beach vacations (again, our treat) with their friends under our high-fiving fun supervision (and eagle eye) have cost us huge bucks we but have hopefully kept them from falling prey to the pornification that this society allows. The teen age girls' STD stats in this week's news should be a wake up call to every parent.
Now that both of ours are married to wonderful Christian spouses, we now have to work and pray for the soon-coming grandkids!(less) -
Congratulations, that's all well and wonderful. But what if you don't have the money to take your kids (let alone their friends) to Disneyland? It's not about protection it's about education. Teaching your kids respect for themselves, their parents, other deserving adults and for each other. My parents were very religious, extremely overprotective and tried to shelter me. I ended up using drugs and becoming pregnant at 17, because they did not speak to me about life in a language i related to. My kids father has been abusing drugs all their life and is currently in prison for the second time. I struggled with drugs when they were young and the abuse of their father. Their dad and I did not part amicably (sp?). My kids have been thru alot of the things that most people would try to shelter them from. They are not criminals (some of their friends are) they don't use drugs (most of their friends and family do) and at 16, 15, and 14, no one is sexually active. They care about other people and each other. It's not about WHERE you raise them or WHO they are raised around, it's about WHAT you raise them to be. WHAT you teach them. But you're right about one thing, you have to be an example, either (honestly) of what not to do, or show them what works.
-
Answered We can do something about this.
We have to let them know the best we can, that what they see on t.v. and in magazines is all a show, most things about it is fake. And celebrities are regular people when they go home.. (well most of them.. I'm not sure about Gary Busy..) lolI'm not sure if that was your question though, was it?